Wednesday, December 10, 2014

'Nothing Gold Can Stay".

I do not want to conclude the blogs on Life’s Best Lessons concerning my late Ma, Mrs. Bina Devi Bhattacharyya. I want the memories of my mother to be kept tucked in the recess of my heart forever and ever and ever. I want to cling on to those memories for remembering my roots, for perpetually bettering myself in the attempt of being a good human being, for helping those who hold the promise of growing as one. And yes, when the time comes for me to take leave of this wonderful world, I want Ma to come down from wherever she happens to be at that time to hold my hand to lead me through to afterlife.
I have already tried to write about the lessons I learnt from my mother. I started with the unshakable faith, her indomitable spirit, love for all, especially her children and grandchildren, honesty and sacrificing mentality and concluded the last blog by writing about what in my opinion, defines my Ma best, her divine sense of forgiveness.
Ma, in life, was my first and best teacher. Surprisingly, her death was a lesson in itself as well.  I have already written about the time in late July in 2006, when I received an urgent call from Jaya, my wife, informing about Ma’s deteriorating condition and subsequent hospitalization. The same day, mainly thanks to the consent of Mr. Y.B.Ghalley, the Principal of my school at that time, I hurried home in a resless frenzy.
I reached Zero Point at around 5 or 5.30 in the evening. I did not have to wait for long at the turning, as I hitch-hiked the first vehicle that came along. While I was trying to stretch my limbs in the back seat of the car, a maddening fragrance of an assortment of flowers lingered in the air. I was dropped off near the BoD at Gedu as the car was not going any further. I spent the next half hour or so desperately trying and praying for a vehicle going down to the border town of Phuentsholing. By 8-8.30, having given up any hope of getting a lift down, I helplessly knocked on the door of my friend Mr. Thukten, the BoD Manager. He was pleasantly surprised to find me at that odd hour, but we spent the rest of the time chatting, watching TV over a cup of steaming coffee and later on driving around the sleepy Gedu town. He must have done all that in order to distract my mind from the thought of my Ma. I must have retired to bed quite late in the night. A nightmarish dream was trying to drive away the sleep from my weary eyes, when I found myself being vehemently shaken by Thukten. A quick look at the watch told me that it was 6 in the morning. He informed me that a truck was going down to Phuentsholing and whether I would like to go by the truck. All my sleepiness was gone instantanously as I told him I would. The wife of my ever smiling and helpful friend made some quick breakfast and off to Phuentsholing I was in a truck, in a flash.
I reached Kolkata the day after (they say, Kolkata is quite near to Chhukha though). My wife, tension writ large on her face, was waiting anxiously for me. After gobbling down some mouthfuls, we left for the hospital. Ma was in the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) of what is undoubtedly the most expensive hospital in Kolkata now. In a coma. Due to the initiative and some kind of street- smartness of the part of my youngest sister, Mrs Tapasi Ghosh, from among all the waiting visitors, I was let in the room. I have already blogged about that experience under the title; I love You in the ICU and as a result, do not want to relive the same experience right now.
Strange as it might sound, a couple of days after my arrival in Kolkata, Ma miraculously recovered from her deathbed, to the utter surprise and disbelief of all and sundry, and was therefore, shifted to a general bed on the second floor. Surrounded by a host of her close relatives, the fighter in Ma could also sit up in the bed for some time. I even remember joking with her if she could recognise me or not. She did! But soon afterwards she had what the doctors told us afterward, another seizure and had to be shifted back to the ICU once again. I had no idea at that time that I had already talked with her for the last time.
I also remember Dr. Ajay Sarkar; expressing his desire to have Ma on the life-support system for one more try. While doing that he was looking at me intently, trying to find some encouragement or positive signs. I kept my head down all along. An enquiry earlier at the Reception had made it known to me that the bills for Ma’s treatment at the hospital till that day amounted to something like 1, 80, 000/-
Thanks to my elder brother and the other siblings, money was not going to be an issue. But the truth that I had very little to do with her treatment, at least financially, let me keep my otherwise blabbering mouth shut. Later on all I could do was to wait impatiently outside for the inevitable to happen.
At around 11-11.30 in the morning of 11th August, the junior doctor called me to the consulting room and informed me that they were trying their best, but most of Ma’s organs were defunct as she had a multiple organ failure. He came back to the door again soon afterwards and asked me to be prepared mentally. He also advised us to offer her the last holy water as per the Hindu custom! The life of the lady I have always loved the most was slowly ebbing away. And there was nothing I could do. I have never been very religious. Nor have I ever bothered about mustering the slokas from The Gita or The Upanishads. I do not believe in race, caste or creed. How could I offer a spoonful of the holy water to someone, who, to my knowledge and belief, was the most pious lady I have ever seen in my life?  I found myself oscillating between the pricks of conscience and a strong sense of duty. At that moment, sitting on one of those chairs outside the ICU, I had an inexpressible urge to do something extraordinary for her, to let her know that I was not going to be a failure in life, that I would always try to do something to make her proud of me.
Good God has always the solutions or answers to the most difficult of problems. Precisely then one of my nephews turned up. He must have earned a lot of merits by being the first one to offer a spoonful of the holy water to his thakurma (grandma). Jaya and I followed next.  Then the wind, the air became still and silent. Ma was gone.
Later on draped in a white cloth, her still body was carried in a glass case, via Eastern Bypass, along Park Circus Maidan to our ancestral home at 41, Deblane, where she had entered as a newly-wed bride many many moons ago. Her immobile body covered with wreaths of flower garlands, was laid out in the courtyard for people to pay their last homage. Amidst all the heart-wrenching wailings and sorrow, the fragrance of the incense sticks permeated the sombre atmosphere. Overcome with a multitude of emotions, I stepped forward and held her feet for the last time, before her final journey. I begged her forgiveness, if I had hurt her feelings unknowingly ever and sent up a silent prayer:

If there is Life after death, I would like to be born as your son once again, Ma.

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